COMPUTER WOMEN

INTERNET woman: woman of difficult access.

SERVER woman: always busy when you need her.

WINDOWS woman: everyone knows that she can't do anything right,
but none can live without her.

POWERPOINT woman: only Bill Gates has the will to use her more
than half an hour.

EXCEL woman: they say she can do a lot of things but you mostly
use her for your four basic needs.

WORD woman: she has always a surprise reserved for you, but no
one in the world is able to fully understand her

DOS woman: everyone has had her at least once, but no one wants
her anymore.

BACKUP woman: you have always believed that she has everything
you need, but when the "X-hour" comes, you find out that she has
always missed something.

VIRUS woman: also known as "wife"; when you are vulnerable,
she comes, install herself and uses all your resources. If you
try to uninstall her you will lose half your assets, but if 
you don't try to uninstall her you will lose everything.

SCANDISK woman: you know that she is good and that she only
wants to help you, but you never know what she is really doing that
for.

SCREENSAVER woman: she is not worth anything, but at least she's fun!

RAM woman: she forgets everything you say when you disconnect her.

HARD-DISK woman: she remembers everything, FOR EVER.

MULTIMEDIA woman: she makes mundane things look beautiful.

MICROSOFT woman: she want to have the domination over all the
men she meets, and she tries to convince them that this is the best
thing for them. She will do as best as she can to make you fight
against the other women, she promises you that you will have
everything you want if you will give her your address book. Before
you find it out, she will be the only one in your life. It will come the
day you will need her permission to open your refrigerator or to start
your car.

PASSWORD woman: you believe to be the only one knowing her,
but in reality all the world does....

MP3 woman: everybody wants to play with her...

USER woman: She screws up everything she does and she always
asks for more than she needs.

CPU woman: From outside, she looks like she can do anything, but
from inside she is empty...

MONITOR woman: She makes life looks more interesting.

CD-ROM woman: she is always faster and faster.

DATAWAREHOUSING woman: she keeps you informed of
everything, except of what you really want to know.

E-MAIL woman: Out of every ten things she says, eight are baloney.